Bitchin'...

Hey ya'all!

Well, here I am, still alive! Yes, I wake up in the mornin's and am so blessed to be awake, alive, breathin' and snap cracklin' and poppin' as I do it...heehee
Oh, the joys of sharin' laughs with ya'all here on the internets, too bad we keep gettin' wanked over by different video sharin' sites, SOOOOOOOOO, WITH THAT BEIN' SAID....
I think we are in the midst of gettin' our very own personalized web site! Has anyone out there done this? And done it for free? Cuz I know it usually costs money, and we are researchin' and may have found one that does it fer free, so we will keep ya'all posted, and please give me any feedback ya'all have cuz we need the help!!! LMAO
All I wanna do is make people laugh with my ridiculous stories, and I don't want no one to be able to have control over that but me dammit!!!!! Okay, enough bitchin'...how's bout a joke...
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What is the leading cause in death with lesbians?
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HAIRBALLS!!!! AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAA

Have a Happy Day ya'all, and don't ferget to SMILE!!! :)
XXX...Jolean

Flip-Flop Mowin'....

Hey ya'all!!!

Well, the kids are still gone fer a few weeks at camp, CAMP LITTLE BASTARDS!!! AHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAH
With that bein' said, I'm stuck doin' the yard work.
So, I borrowed my friend Lulu's lawn mower since mine broke. Well, it's a push mower, but i didn't realize what kind of push mower, it's like super charged.
I got it started, and went to push the level for the blade, well there is another damn lever on there that's powers it to go!!! Not realizin' this, I pushed both levers and off the damn mower went with my upper body, I slipped, hit my damn head on the handle bar, my rhinestone flip-flop went flyin', and the mower ran it over, spewin' rhinestones and foam all over the yard, with me cryin', not because I was bleedin', cuz the damn mower ate my favorite flip-flops!!!! SON OF A BITCH!!!

Have a Happy Day, and don't ferget to SMILE!!! :)
XXX...Jolean :)

Picturin'....

Hey ya'all!

Hump Day Blog Day....WOOWOOO!!!!
And have I got a treat fer ya'all. Well, I was cleanin' out the other day, of course findin' crusty sheets AND crusty underwear in the boys' room, food wrappers, pizza boxes, and home test pregnancy kits in the girls' rooms, liquor bottles in the baby's room, and some ol' pics in the closet...surprise surprise, tex is in one of them, heehee....
...and so is my girl Antoinette. This was from a visit a few years back, five I think, yeah, cuz it was the first season of filmin' JDi!, so enjoy those drunk bitches in these coupla pics, and with yers truly of course...heehee

Have a Happy Day, and don't ferget to SMILE!!! :)
XXX...Jolean

Soap Fartin'...

Hey ya'all!

Well, it's just one of them days, it's hot and I'm horny, but of course, my ex Tex is still, again, back in the slammer. He sure is racking up the ol' punches in the, uh, his dance card I guess we'll call it. Here I am worried bout that damn toothless stripper from the Rusty Box, and he's prolly droppin' his soap in the prison shower too many times to count! No wonder he's always fartin' like the damn flood gates broke open on the city!!! AHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAAAAA
Maybe I need to look up my ol' cell mate, Big Martha, fer some soap droppin'...heehee

I hope ya'all have a Happy Day, and don't ferget to SMILE!!! :)
XXX...Jolean

Meat Eatin'....

Hey ya'all!!!

WOW, it sure is beautiful weather right now here in Maine, and I am fixin' to get my butt outside and into some kind of body of water!!! I mean I'm sweatin' like a stuffed pig, and that ain't good when yer wearin' granny panties, and they become a thong in yer butt crack!!! ahahhahahahhahahaaaa
We are gettin' the summer weather that we shoulda had ALLLLL summer, but whatevs ya'all, I'll take what I can get, just like that summer I spent down in Tijuana...of course, I now don't have to suffer food poisonin' from meat bein' sold off the street corner by some gringo with sores all over his hands...heehee

I hope ya'all have a Happy Day and don't ferget to SMILE!!! :)
XXX...Jolean

Joke of the Day LOL...

Hey ya'all!!!!

Okay, it's the joke of the day, so hang on to yer bonnet strings and don't get yer panties in a bunch....heehee

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane?
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A pilot, you racist!!!

AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!!!!
Have a Happy Day ya'all, and don't ferget to SMILE!!!
XXX...Jolean :)

Schoolin'...

Mornin' Ya'all!

Well, here we go with another beautiful day here in Maine, after a crazy cold spell, I am ready to go back to FLORIDA!!!!! AHAHHAHAHAHAAAA....Son of a Bitch!
But one thing is great, kids are finally goin' back to school, yup, that's right! I get my days back....woowoo!!!
Of course, I remember when I was a little girl, we never went back to school until after Labor Day, of course, lots of us girls needed that longer summer so we could get our bodies back into shape fer school after havin' babies....heehee

Have a Happy Day ya'all, and don't ferget to SMILE!!! :)
XXX...Jolean

Dirty Husbandsin'....

Mornin' ya'all!!!!

Geez, it's seems like as of late, i ain't been able to post a blog until like midnight!!! LOL My girl Lulu has been gettin' my ass up early in the mornin' to help her move shit, cuz our kids and husbands/ex's suck filthy cornholes!!! ahahahhahahhaaaa...so make sure ya check'm out, not our dirty men, the blogs, PERVS!!!!! heehee
And everyone please say a prayer fer Ma Thorton, she's in the hospital today havin' a lil' surgery, don't worry I'm sure she'll be fine, prolly will even score a date before she leaves...heeehee

Have a Happy Day ya'all, and don't ferget to SMILE!!!
XXX...Jolean :)

Sexy and Excitin'...

Hey ya'all!!!

Just got a video up on one of the new sites for our ever-growin' and expandin' (yeah, like adult diapers...heehee) Jolean Empire...
Make sure to check it out, and stay tuned fer more excitin' and fun and sexy and KRAZY videos to be posted on here and re-visiting some of our library videos with re-edits and updates!!!! Of course, just cuz I may have had a burnin' rash in an old video don't mean I still got it!!!! AHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAAAA....but ya have to dig like a furry badger to find out...heehee

Have a Happy Day, and don't ferget to SMILE!!!!
XXX...Jolean
hopefully one of these will work...lol...till i figure it out, THANK YOU FER ALL THE SUPPORT AND LOVE EVERYONE!!!!
Keep on keepin' on....

http://www.veoh.com/watch/v76437792J2QHrjEj

Blondin'...

Hey ya'all!!!

It's time for the Late Night 'Joke of the Day'....


A redhead tells her blonde stepsister, "I slept with a Brazilian...."
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The blonde replies, "Oh my God! You slut! How many is a brazilian?"

AHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA....true story!

Have a Happy Day, and don't ferget to SMILE!!!
XXX...Jolean :)

Positive Bein'....

Hey Ya'all!!!

I hope everyone is havin' a most fabulous weekend!!!
I just wanted to send a note to ya'all and let ya know I'm doin' well, not drunk, not gettin' laid, so maybe not so well...ahahhahahahhahahahahhaha.
Anyhoo, I got stuff goin' on with youtube, and hopefully it'll all be corrected soon, it's playin' the waitin' game right now. Lord knows I haven't done that enough with my ex husband and 8 1/2 kids, and the such....heehee
Stay tuned and get a hold of me on here for now, or at joleandoesit@gmail.com

Stay Happy, keep positive, and continue movin' forward ya'all....life is too short, so don't waste it!!!!
XXX...Jolean :)

Robin Williams...

Hey ya'all...

How's everyone's summer goin' anyhoo???? Mine has been AAAALLLLLLL screwy, with movin', kids, my ex, and crazy family, I don't know if anyone would ever put me in a nut house, cuz I'm livin' it!!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH
And it is also a sad day to here of the passing of a true idol, Robin Williams. Words can't describe the sadness, but, I believe he is in a much better place, and not sufferin' here no more. He is such a comedic inspiration, to me, and countless others out there. Rest in Peace....

Have a Happy Day, and don't forget to SMILE ya'all, cuz life is short, soooo, ENJOY THE HELL OUTTA IT!!!!
XXX...Jolean

Hangin'...(heehee)

Hey ya'all...
Just wanted to let ya know I ain't dead or hung myself in the deep freezer, son of a bitch!!!!! Been havin' internets troubles and the such, ya know, when ya live in a small town in the mountains, don't expect miracles when it comes to be a famous internets star....heeheee
I'll try and keep ya'all updated from time to time this week, and we are tryin' to get new vids up too, stay hang in there with us, by the way, how's it hangin' stud???? You know who I'm talkin' to....heehee

Have a Happy Day and don't ferget to SMILE!!!
XXX...Jolean ;)

Flashlightin'....

Hey ya'all!!!!!

Okay, here's the joke of the week!!!!

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A man and a woman started to have sex in the middle of a dark forest. After about 15 minutes of it, the man finally gets up and says, "Damn, I wish I had a flashlight!". The woman says, "Me too, you've been eating grass for the past ten minutes!"

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AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHHAHAAAAAAA!!!
Have a Happy Day, and don't ferget to SMILE!!! :)
XXX...Jolean

Thuggin'...

Hey ya'all!!!!

Well, lemme tell ya, me and my girl Lulu was at Rite-Aid the other day. And when I go out, especially runnin' errands, I wear a big ol' hat and big sunglasses, it's just my damn thing!!!! ...especially on those side-effects days(hangovers)....heehee
Anyhoo, we was lookin' at aspirins and shit like that when this lady comes on over and asks me to remove my hat and sunglasses!!! WELL, I guess they got this policy now, maybe cuz they been ripped off so much?, that when you enter their stores, ya gotta remove things like that, cuz ya look like a thug and may hold up the store!!!!!! SON OF A BITCH!!!!! Do I look like a thug? a criminal? a hoodlum??? Bitch please!!!!
Well, as she was sayin' this shit to me and repeatin' it, I'm just lookin' at her like, Bitch you are mental! HA! Lulu is next to me just laughin' her ass off in disbelief. I just kept sayin', oh yeah that's nice, I ain't takin' my hat and sunglasses off, I put them on for a reason! PLUS, if I wanted to rob a joint, I would want them to see me, I want the world to know that shit!!!
AHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA

I hope ya'all have a Happy Day, and don't forget to SMILE!!! :)
XXX...Jolean

Singin'....

Mornin' ya'all!!!!

Well, I'm goin' back, back, back to my roots.....wooowooo!!!!! I dunno, that song was in my head and I needed to sing it, or else it woulda ruined my day by bein' stuck in my freakin' head!!!!!!
I mean, sometimes, well, a lot of times cuz I ain't gonna lie to ya'all, i get certain songs stuck in my damn head, and it takes some loud singin' and sometimes some dancin' to get rid of that shit!!!! And my kids ain't impressed, and believe me, everytime I start up, them little bastards is linin' up against the wall and judgin' me, like on one of them reality singin' shows!!!! AHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA.....i can't tell ya how many times i've been voted off the show....son of a bitch!

Have a Happy Day, and don't ferget to SMILE!!!
XXX...Jolean ;)

Back Seatin'(gettin' laid)....

Mornin' Ya'all!!!

Well, it's comin' up on our town's local summer celebration, and I better see some ol' 'friends' of mine, cuz this girl needs to get laid, oh, uhhhh, I mean catch up on ol' times, well, ol' times involves me with my panties down around my ankles in the back seat of an '88 Ford Pinto, with a cramp in my hip and a drunk in my cooter, so yeah, gettin' laid....heeeheee
It'll be great to see the old gang, and what I mean by that, is the elderly folks doin' their wheelchair races down Main Street....ahahahhahahahahhahahaa

Have a Happy Day, and don't ferget to SMILE!!! :)
XXX...Jolean